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Love & Marriage - Issue #001 - February 2003

© 2003 Open Circles - http://www.no-problem-marriage-counseling.com

Table of Contents

Ramblings

Well folks, this is it! Congratulations to us all.
After an extensive pregnancy and delayed delivery, our new project, "Love & Marriage" Newsletter, was born.

As proud parents, we naturally hope the offspring will be a newsletter that readers find both interesting and useful.
We'll do our best, but for the most part the success of this little e-print wonder will depend on you, our faithful reader.
Feedback, the ultimate steering wheel of any relationship, is what we ask of you first and foremost.
Let us know what you like and what you would like to see added. Also, be straight with us as to what you dislike (don't worry, we can handle it).

Creating this newsletter and especially the new website confronted us with our own relationship. Like all healthy couples we have our fair share of turmoil in addition to the good times. We could have chosen to be "counseling experts" and tell you how your marriage SHOULD be, we instead chose to be "human" and communicate how your marriage CAN be.

And what better day to launch a new relationship advice newsletter than Valentine's Day?! So today, in our Relationship Tip column we'll share some *hot* pointers how to make your Valentine's Day more romantic than ever.

In today's Sex Advice column we share about the three kinds of sex we all need. Feel free to email us with any question or problem you have regarding sex, and we'll do our best to shine some light on it in a future issue.

Research shows that in order to keep your marriage alive, you need to invest an uninterrupted 13-18 hours per week together.
Do you? Does anyone?
However, it is still true that if you refuse to make time for your relationship today - you're gonna lose it somewhere along the road...
So, in today's Feature Article we'll attempt to show you how you can spend creative time together and have fun whilst doing it.

So, let's cut the monologue and move directly into the creation of a happy, passionate, satisfying and powerful relationship.

See you online, Nisandeh and Vered Neta

Feature Article

Make Time for Your Relationship

By Nisandeh Neta

I remember drawing those little red hearts on little post-it notes...

That was years ago, when I was trying to impress my first girlfriend being oh-so-romantic.
Today, romance has changed for me.
It has become love, consideration, affection, surprise and even naughtiness.
It is the time or activities we share together.
It is this underlying passion I have for my partner.
But most of all, romance is a way of making the "everyday" exciting.
It doesn't take a lot of money or effort - just a commitment to making my relationship special by paying attention to it and... willingness to make the time.

Did you know that love is a four-letter word spelled T-I-M-E?

Like couples everywhere, we found ourselves pressured by the demands of daily life, work, raising a child, finances and many others too numerous to mention.
Yet, through all our years together, we have somehow found a way to balance these things, and still keep our relationship fresh and exciting.
In this article, I would like to share how we have done it.

Romance creates this wonderful warm feeling.
It keeps the spark alive. It keeps your relationship vital and interesting.
And... it takes time!
Time to nurture your relationship, to enhance it, and keep it flourishing - time which is all too precious for many couples.

More and more couples are in two-career households, and, at the end of the day, we all return to our "third career," our homes.
This involves childcare, cleaning, cooking, laundry...
Even if you are a parent at home, you also experience pressures and demands that often leave little room for romance.

By establishing priorities and setting goals, by making better use of the time you have, and by creating time you thought you didn't have, you CAN find more time for each other.

Let's make it practical...

First - Prioritize. Prioritize. Prioritize.
You can spend your time in one of four ways, doing things that are:

• Important and urgent - caring for your child that has fallen down and is bleeding
• Important but not urgent - sitting together sharing about your day
• Not important but urgent - taking your suit for dry cleaning, before tomorrow's meeting
• Not important and not urgent - switching on the TV and zapping between the channels

Here are a few important, but not urgent, activities to put high on your priority list:

Your daily chat together
Sit together for a short uninterrupted face-to-face time every day to share your thoughts and feelings.
Tell each other the little everyday things as well as the big news.
Focusing on each other for as little as fifteen minutes can make a huge difference.

Your weekly night together
Plan a specific night each week for your special date.
Once scheduled, treat the commitment as if it were written in stone.
Take turns planning the activity and surprising the other with a favorite home-cooked meal, a movie, a long walk through the park, a cocktail at a favorite cafe or a bubble bath followed by a picnic dinner on the living room floor. It doesn't have to be expensive, just generous.

Your little date together
You'll be surprised how lively conversation can become when you're meeting in the middle of the day and there's no batch of chores to worry about.
Try one of the following dates or invent your own:

• Get up earlier than normal and have breakfast together
• Use your commuting time to be together
• Meet at lunchtime for a quiet meal together
• Meet after work at a restaurant for a drink and an appetizer before dinner
• Go for a walk
• Stay home, but instead of cooking dinner, order in

Even if you've been together for a long time, there is no reason to give up the excitement and fun that comes with the anticipation of looking forward to a planned evening or activity. And, by making dates, you'll set aside the special time your relationship thrives on.

Enjoy your love, passion and romance...

Sex Advice

The 3 Kinds of Sex, Happy Couples Need

1. Quickies

Quickies are a handy in a busy life, but they offer a lot more.
They're tailor-made for those marriages in which one partner has a higher sex-per-week requirement than the other.
And, approached with the right attitude, quickies can inject passion back into your relationship.

Bear in mind, however, that if you go too far in favor of the quickie, problems are likely to crop up.

2. Comfort Sex

It's one of the great bonuses of monogamy. Comfort sex is lovemaking that can only be enjoyed by two people who know each other, and each other's bodies, extremely well.

This sex is loving rather than crazy-in-love. It's not about athletic skill or numbers of orgasms, but rather about the bonds of time, experience, and intimacy you and your partner share.

But beware; too much comfort sex can get boring.
If you're having mostly comfort sex, change the circumstances. Wear something sexy, eat dinner on the floor in front of the fireplace, then make love on the kitchen table.

3. Mind-Blowing Sex

Every once in a while, you get lucky and fall into an erotic encounter that reminds you that you are one hot couple.
Usually, it's circumstances that send sex into the "WOW" territory: The kids are away, it's your anniversary, or you're on vacation.

Other times, mind-blowing sex is the simple result of trying something new that works. Maybe it's a new position or a different room of the house or fulfilling each other's sexual fantasies.

In exploring and experimenting, you might discover something that really feels wonderful, and suddenly the sex is elevated from everyday to spectacular.

But no one can have a sex life that is 100 percent earth-shattering. It would become a burden to think of something new to do night after night, and your body would grow tired.

Find the balance between quickies, comfort sex, and spectacular sex and pretty soon, you'll realize that variety really is the spice of a great sex life.

Expert's Tip

20 Tips for a Perfect Valentine's Day

In case you're staying in...

Make it a cozy night for two with romance, you and your lover... what more could you ask for?
Staying home to celebrate Valentine's Day can be a very rewarding experience because you have a tendency to feel more at ease in your own home.
This can add that extra element of romance to your plans and really allows for those special moments of closeness and love. When planning any romantic event at your home, it is also important to set the mood and try to plan something you know your lover will love.

You want your lover to know exactly how you feel about them with an intimate night at home, just you and your lover.

Below are a few ideas, from the playful to extremely romantic, to help you create just the right celebration of your love for each other.

1. Get a set of body paints. Lay out a large sheet on the floor.
   Spend the evening painting each other!
   Follow up with a steamy shower to rinse each other off.
2. Have an outdoor picnic on your fire escape, patio, in your backyard, or spread a blanket on the living room floor and have an indoor picnic or ...
3. Stage a progressive love dinner and serve each course in a different room with the dessert ending up in the bedroom!
4. Rent all of your favorite romantic movies, make some popcorn and hot chocolate, and stay up all night watching movies and cuddling, or ...
5. Stay up all night together and watch the sun set and then rise, or ...
6. Set up a tent in the backyard, have a fire in the BBQ, roast some marshmallows and lay out under the stars!
7. Surprise your love with a bubble bath for two.
   When you're done, wash and comb/brush their hair for them.
8. Hire a professional masseuse to give you both massages, or give one yourself!
9. Take turns reading a sexy or romantic book aloud to each other.
10. Do that one thing that your love has always wanted to do or have happen to them.

In case you're going out...

Going out for Valentine's Day is one of the most popular ways to celebrate this romantic holiday, especially if you haven't had a chance to get out together for awhile!

Where you go and what you do can make the difference between just another date or an incredibly memorable event. If you've decided to go out for Valentine's Day, or are still considering it, we've compiled some great ideas on what to do and where to go!

We've also included some tips on how to make your Valentine's celebration as special as it can possibly be!! Remember: no matter what you decide to do, it is the company you're in and the feelings you share together that makes an event memorable!

1. Go out and dine in the best restaurant you can find.
2. Go on a champagne/dinner/dancing cruise.
3. Pack a few quick finger foods, get some romantic music and warm blankets and have a picnic! Throw in some cuddling and great conversation and you definitely have a moment to remember! Or even...
4. Set up a candlelit dinner, wine or champagne in a romantic spot somewhere.
   Then go to your lover's house and blindfold them, don't tell them what you're doing, and take them to your ready-made romantic spot.
   When you get there, remove the blindfold!
5. Rent a chauffeured limousine and drive to a scenic spot for this picnic.
6. Rent a room at a favorite hotel.
   Make sure to get a room with a Jacuzzi and order room service.
7. Go to a symphony concert, musical, or other type of theatre production.
8. Crash a wedding reception.
9. Ride through the park or other local area after dark in a horse drawn carriage.
10. Enjoy a sunset walk along the beach, lake, or mountains.

What's New?

In No-Problem-Marriage-Counseling.Com we intend to include original, practical and valuable information that can assist in the transformation of any relationship into a satisfying, passionate, joyful one.
We've created numerous pages of information concerning romance, sexuality, romantic vacations, couple games, advice columns, poetic love texts, relationship articles and more.
We're still under construction, but adding about 15-20 new pages a month.
So come and visit us online often.

Today's Main Attractions:
Relight the fire in your marriage sex (including special article about tantra and the couple massage we teach in our couples' workshops - the Touch of Passion).
Play some couple games - choose from the romantic games or the erotic games.
And if you're thinking already about your vacation together, we have some ideas - check them out.

Today's Special Offer:
The Art of Intimacy is a loving, juicy and playful weekend workshop, where you are invited to learn more about your body, your emotions, and your ways of relating towards yourself and others...
In this workshop you will learn to love yourself so you can love your partner, to trust yourself and your partner, to awaken your senses, to rediscover your body and its pleasures, to harmonize your Inner Man and Inner Woman, to awaken your wild-Self and above all to relax with who you are and enjoy yourself.
And this April (7-14), we have a special deal for you - an 8-day full-board vacation in the Algarve, Portugal including the Art of Intimacy weekend workshop for just $725 (675 euro) per person (excluding airfare).
For more information and booking, click here.

Today's Recommended Link
Since it's Valentine's Day - we thought to recommend you the best online shop for lingerie and sexy underwear (both for men and women).
It is our favorite shop as they offer a huge selection of really the most beautiful stuff, free shipping (on $50+ orders), same day shipping, fast email replies and total satisfaction guaranteed.
If you plan spoiling yourself (and your lover) - check them out.